The List 5264
Good Tuesday Morning April 7 to all. The rain returned yesterday and is supposed to be with us for 4 days.
Regards
Skip
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Today in Naval History
April 7
1776
The Continental brig Lexington, commanded by John Barry, captures the British tender Edward near the Virginia Capes after a fierce fight that takes nearly an hour.
1944
USS Saufley (DD 465) sinks the Japanese submarine I 2, west-northwest of New Hanover, while USS Champlin (DD 601) is damaged after intentionally ramming German submarine U-856 380 miles off Nova Scotia, Canada. Champlin then teams with USS Huse (DE 145) to sink U-856.
1944
USS Gustafson (DE 182) sinks the German submarine U 857 off Cape Cod, Mass.
1945
Fast Carrier Task Force 58 aircraft attack the Japanese First Diversion Attack Force, sinking Japanese battleship Yamato and light cruiser Yahagi west-southwest of Kagoshima, Japan, as well as sinking four Japanese destroyers and damaging four others in the East China Sea.
1990
The Los Angeles-class fast attack submarine USS Albany (SSN 573) is commissioned at Naval Station Norfolk.
1979
USS Ohio (SSBN 726), the first Trident submarine, launches at Groton, Conn. She is commissioned into the Navy in November that same year. Following a conversion to a guided-missile submarine in 2006, she is now SSGN-726.
1993
The Avenger-class mine countermeasure ship USS Warrior (MCM 10) is commissioned. The ship is currently based in Sasebo, Japan.
2017
On the orders of President Trump, USS Ross (DDG 71) and USS Porter (DDG 78) launch Tomahawk missiles into Syria April 7, in retaliation for the regime of Bashar Assad using nerve agents to attack his own people.
Thanks to CHINFO
Executive Summary:
• Numerous outlets reported on Secretary Modly's apology to the crew and former CO of USS Theodore Roosevelt.
• Multiple outlets report that President Trump granted Governor Cuomo's request for USNS Comfort to accept COVID-19 patients ahead of an anticipated spike in infections in New York.
• Navy Times reports that the first crew member on USNS Comfort tested positive for COVID-19.
This Day in World History April 7
1199 English King Richard I is killed by an arrow at the Siege of the Castle of Chalus in France.
1789 The First U.S. Congress begins regular sessions at Federal Hall in New York City.
1814 Granted sovereignty in the island of Elba and a pension from the French government, Napoleon Bonaparte abdicates at Fontainebleau. He is allowed to keep the title of emperor.
1830 Joseph Smith and five others organize the Church of Latter-Day Saints in Seneca, New York.
1862 Confederate forces attack General Ulysses S. Grant at Shiloh, Tennessee.
1865 At the Battle of Sailer's Creek, a third of Lee's army is cut off by Union troops pursuing him to Appomattox.
1896 The Modern Olympics begin in Athens with eight nations participating.
1903 French Army Nationalists are revealed to have forged documents to guarantee a conviction for Alfred Dreyfus.
1909 Americans Robert Peary and Matthew Henson become the first men to reach the North Pole.
1917 The United States declares war on Germany and enters World War I on Allied side.
1924 Four planes leave Seattle on the first successful flight around the world.
1938 The United States recognizes Nazi Germany's conquest of Austria.
1941 German forces invade Greece and Yugoslavia.
1965 President Lyndon B. Johnson authorizes the use of ground troops in combat operations.
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Thanks to Barrel
from a FedEx Pilot
FedEx still operating close to peak internationally, but we've slowed severely domestically. Balances out financially, as we're still "above the line" (reference our last quarterly earnings statement). We've pulled 4 "semi-retired" FedEx MD-11s out of the desert and sent them to the Pacific (where I've been operating for the past 2 ½ months). Every run we're flying there (between Honolulu, Sydney, Guangzhou, Osaka, Narita, Singapore, Thailand, Hong Kong, etc…) are maxed out. No one else flying, so all that residual cargo is being directed our way. That being said, every route is nearly empty, and every airport is completely full of parked jets. A couple of examples:
Flew from Osaka to Beijing during 1 segment of a trip, and saw only 2 additional aircraft airborne the entire flight. During the time we fly that route (one of the busiest in the world), nearly 100+ additional aircraft are normally airborne. Silence on the radio, from the controllers, etc… most pacific airports have 1 controller that now covers regional approach, tower, and ground… ALL 3 of them. We landed in Beijing and were the only moving aircraft the entire time we taxied in, dropped our cargo, reloaded, and taxied out. Saw 2 other aircraft moving on the ground as we took off. But that was it. Literally 600+ aircraft parked in every square inch of concrete on that airport. Beijing (and most airports like it) are down to 1 runway, with all additional being used as parking lots for aircraft. Very eerie to see it like that.
Was lucky enough to have a United deadhead back from Osaka to SFO at the conclusion of one of my runs. Osaka is one of the busiest international "jump-off points" in Japan, and FedEx has a great facility there. From the time I made my way from the FedEx aircraft we landed there, checked in through one of the largest customs facilities I've ever seen (at Osaka International), took an inter-airport train to the international terminal, and finally made my way to the only 1 of 6 lounges open to await my flight's departure (United), I only saw 2 people in the entire airport terminal. TWO. That United flight was on a 787, and Polaris Business Class (which normally holds about 36 people) had 4 of us in it. The entire aircraft had about 40 people total… most were United employees (aircrew and attendants) repositioning back to the United States after their routes had been cancelled. This was United's last flight between Osaka and SFO for a long while (apparently), and there were many hugs and tears with United personnel, Japan airport folks they knew, etc… And the entire United ground crew lined up in a formation to solute the aircraft as we departed… reminded me of Navy cruises when we were launching aircraft to head back to the beach after 6+ months.
Global devastation and economic impacts are very apparent as one travels as much as we do internationally. This is going to take YEARS to recover, and return any semblance of "normalcy" (if that term is even relevant any longer) to many areas all over the globe. Incredible to see the lengths FedEx goes to, to keep us all healthy and protected through this mess. My hats off to our dispatchers, ground managers, and everyone on the team who's making it happen safely for us all… as regulations and customs requirements literally change day to day… flight by flight.
Best,
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Thanks to Al
Monday Morning Thoughts and Humor--Easter
Realizing that most or all of us will be home during this upcoming Holy Week, not all churches have the capability to broadcast services. Our church has been able to broadcast during the current "shelter in place" order. If you would like to worship with us via the internet, here are the links:
7:00PM April 9--Maundy Thursday Service: https://zoom.us/j/740588919
7:00PM April 10--Good Friday Tenebrae Service: https://zoom.us/j/661772864
10:00AM April 12--Easter Sunday Live Stream Service: https://youtu.be/JsjW1BPLVTk
Submitted by John Hudson:
A visiting pastor attended a men's breakfast in the middle of a rural farming area of the country. The group had asked an older farmer decked out in coveralls to say grace for the morning breakfast.
"Lord, I hate buttermilk", the farmer began.
The visiting pastor opened one eye to glance at the farmer and wonder where this was going.
The farmer loudly proclaimed, "Lord, I hate lard."
Now the pastor was growing concerned.
Without missing a beat, the farmer continued, "And Lord, you know I don't much care for raw white flour".
The pastor once again opened an eye to glance around the room and saw that he wasn't the only one to feel uncomfortable.
Then the farmer added, "But Lord, when you mix them all together and bake them, I do love warm fresh biscuits. So Lord, when things come up that we don't like, when life gets hard, when we don't understand what you're saying to us, help us to just relax and wait until you are done mixing. It will probably be even better than biscuits. Amen"
Within that silly prayer, there is great wisdom for all when it comes to complicated situations like we are experiencing in the world today.
Submitted by Al Anderson:
Jeremy was born with a twisted body and a slow mind. At the age of 12, he was still in second grade, seemingly unable to learn. His teacher, Doris Miller, often became exasperated with him. He would squirm in his seat, drool, and make grunting noises. At other times, he spoke clearly and distinctly, as if a spot of light had penetrated the darkness of his brain. Most of the time, however, Jeremy just irritated his teacher.
One day she called his parents and asked them to come in for a consultation. As the Forresters entered the empty classroom, Doris said to them, "Jeremy really belongs in a special school. It isn't fair to him to be with younger children who don't have learning problems. Why, there is a five year gap between his age and that of the other students."
Mrs. Forrester cried softly into a tissue, while her husband spoke. "Miss Miller," he said, "there is no school of that kind nearby. It would be a terrible shock for Jeremy if we had to take him out of this school. We know he really likes it here."
Doris sat for a long time after they had left, staring at the snow outside the window. Its coldness seemed to seep into her soul. She wanted to sympathize with the Forresters. After all, their only child had a terminal illness. But it wasn't fair to keep him in her class. She had 18 other youngsters to teach, and Jeremy was a distraction. Furthermore, he would never learn to read and write. Why waste any more time trying? As she pondered the situation, guilt washed over her. Here I am complaining when my problems are nothing compared to that poor family, she thought. "Lord, please help me to be more patient with Jeremy."
From that day on, she tried hard to ignore Jeremy's noises and his blank stares. Then one day, he limped to her desk, dragging his bad leg behind him. "I love you, Miss Miller," he exclaimed, loud enough for the whole class to hear. The other students snickered, and Doris' face turned red.
She stammered, "Wh-why that's very nice, Jeremy. N-now please take your seat."
Spring came, and the children talked excitedly about the coming of Easter. Doris told them the story of Jesus, and then to emphasize the idea of new life springing forth, she gave each of the children a large plastic egg. "Now," she said to them, "I want you to take this home and bring it back tomorrow with something inside that shows new life. Do you understand?"
"Yes, Miss Miller," the children responded enthusiastically, all except for Jeremy.
He listened intently; his eyes never left her face. He did not even make his usual noises. Had he understood what she had said about Jesus' death and resurrection? Did he understand the assignment? Perhaps she should call his parents and explain the project to them.
That evening, Doris' kitchen sink stopped up. She called the landlord and waited an hour for him to come by and unclog it. After that, she still had to shop for groceries, iron a blouse, and prepare a vocabulary test for the next day. She completely forgot about phoning Jeremy's parents.
The next morning, 19 children came to school, laughing and talking as they placed their eggs in the large wicker basket on Miss Miller's desk. After they completed their math lesson, it was time to open the eggs.
In the first egg, Doris found a flower. "Oh yes, a flower is certainly a sign of new life," she said. "When plants peek through the ground, we know that spring is here."
A small girl in the first row waved her arm. "That's my egg, Miss Miller," she called out.
The next egg contained a plastic butterfly, which looked very real. Doris held it up. "We all know that a caterpillar changes and grows into a beautiful butterfly. Yes, that's new life, too."
Little Judy smiled proudly and said, "Miss Miller, that one is mine."
Next, Doris found a rock with moss on it. She explained that moss, too, showed life.
Billy spoke up from the back of the classroom, "My daddy helped me," he beamed.
Then Doris opened the fourth egg. She gasped. The egg was empty. Surely it must be Jeremy's she thought, and of course, he did not understand her instructions. If only she had not forgotten to phone his parents. Because she did not want to embarrass him, she quietly set the egg aside and reached for another.
Suddenly, Jeremy spoke up. "Miss Miller, aren't you going to talk about my egg?"
Flustered, Doris replied, "But Jeremy, your egg is empty."
He looked into her eyes and said softly, "Yes, but Jesus' tomb was empty, too.'
Time stopped. When she could speak again, Doris asked him, "Do you know why the tomb was empty?"
"Oh, yes," Jeremy said, "Jesus was killed and put in there. Then His Father raised Him up."
The recess bell rang. While the children excitedly ran out to the school yard, Doris cried. The cold inside her melted completely away.
Three months later, Jeremy died. Those who paid their respects at the mortuary were surprised to see 19 eggs on top of his casket, all of them empty.
The making of these Easter cookies are a really great "hands-on" way of helping the children in your lives, to understand what Easter is all about. It is recommended that they be made Saturday night before Easter. You will need::
1c. whole pecans
1 tsp. vinegar
3 egg whites
A pinch of salt
1c. sugar
Zipper baggie
Wooden spoon
Tape
Bible
· Preheat oven to 300 (This is important--don't wait till you're half done with the recipe).
· Place pecans in zipper baggie and let children beat them with the wooden spoon to break into small pieces. Explain that after Jesus was arrested, He was beaten by the Roman soldiers. Read John 19:1-3.
· Let each child smell the vinegar. Put 1 tsp. vinegar into mixing bowl. Explain that when Jesus was thirsty on the cross, he was given vinegar to drink. Read John 19:28-30.
· Add egg whites to vinegar. Eggs represent life. Explain that Jesus gave His life to give us life. Read John 10:10-11.
· Sprinkle a little salt into each child's hand. Let them taste it and brush the rest into the bowl. Explain that this represents the salty tears shed by Jesus' followers, and the bitterness of our own sin. Read Luke 23:27.
· So far, the ingredients are not very appetizing. Add 1c. sugar. Explain that the sweetest part of the story is that Jesus died because He loves us. He wants us to know and belong to Him. Read Ps. 34:8 and John 3:16.
· Beat with a mixer on high speed for 12 to 15 minutes until stiff peaks are formed. Explain that the color white represents the purity in God's eyes of those whose sins have been cleansed by Jesus. Read Isa. 1:18 and John 3:1-3.
· Fold in broken nuts Drop by teaspoons onto wax paper covered cookie sheet. Explain that each mound represents the rocky tomb where Jesus' body was laid. Read Matt. 27:57-60.
· Put the cookie sheet in the oven, close the door and turn the oven off. Give each child a piece of tape and seal the oven door. Explain that Jesus' tomb was sealed. Read Matt. 27:65-66.
· GO TO BED! Explain that they may feel sad to leave the cookies in the oven overnight. Jesus' followers were in despair when the tomb was sealed. Read John 16:20 and 22.
· On Easter morning, open the oven and give everyone a cookie. Notice the cracked surface and take a bite. The cookies are hollow!
· On the first Easter, Jesus' followers were amazed to find the tomb open and empty. Read Matt. 28:1-9
And now for some humor…
Still haven't decided where to go for Easter…the living room or the bedroom.
Top Reasons to Celebrate Easter Sunday:
You absolutely loved the movie, "The Ten Commandments".
You look really, really good in yellow.
It's a good time to check out your neighborhood church and not be noticed.
You have this bunny suit you love to wear, but are too insecure to wear it without a reason.
Even though you don't know what it is, you really like the sound of hearing the "Passion story."
You figured since Jesus went to all THAT trouble to make it to the first Easter, you'd give it a shot.
As a Christian you celebrate the resurrection every other day, why not Easter too?
Yesterday, Palm Sunday, because of a sore throat, five-year-old Johnny stayed home from church with a sitter. When the family returned home, they were carrying several palm fronds. Johnny asked them what they were for.
"People held them over Jesus' head as he walked by," his father told him.
"Wouldn't you know it," Johnny fumed, "the one Sunday I don't go and he shows up."
Submitted by Alan Krause Jr.:
It was that time, during the Sunday morning service, for the children's sermon. All the children were invited to come forward.
One little girl was wearing a particularly pretty dress and, as she sat down, the pastor leaned over and said, "That is a very pretty dress. Is it your Easter Dress?"
The little girl replied, directly into the pastor's clip-on microphone, "Yes, and my Mom says it's a 'bitch' to iron."
A friend was in front of me coming out of church one day, and the preacher was standing at the door as he always is to shake hands. He grabbed my friend by the hand and pulled him aside.
Pastor said, "You need to join the Army of the Lord!"
My friend said, "I'm already in the Army of the Lord, Pastor."
Pastor questioned, "How come I don't see you except at Christmas and Easter?"
He whispered back, "I'm in the secret service."
One Easter Sunday morning as the minister was preaching the children's sermon; he reached into his bag of props and pulled out an egg. He pointed at the egg and asked the children, "What's in here?"
"I know" a little boy exclaimed..."Pantyhose!"
Submitted by Adela Pizano:
A man was blissfully driving along the highway, when he saw the Easter Bunny hopping across the middle of the road. He swerved to avoid hitting the bunny, but unfortunately the rabbit jumped in front of his car and was hit. The basket of eggs went flying all over the place.
The driver, being a sensitive man as well as an animal lover, pulled over to the side of the road, and got out to see what had become of the bunny carrying the basket. Much to his dismay, the colorful bunny was dead. The driver felt guilty and began to cry.
A woman driving down the same highway saw the man crying on the side of the road and pulled over. She stepped out of her car and asked the man what was wrong. "I feel terrible," he explained, "I accidentally hit the Easter Bunny and killed it. There may not be an Easter because of me. What should I do?"
The woman told the man not to worry. She knew exactly what to do. She went to her car trunk, and pulled out a spray can. She walked over to the limp, dead bunny, and sprayed the entire contents of the can onto the furry animal.
Miraculously the Easter Bunny came back to life, jumped up, picked up the spilled eggs and candy, waved its paw at the two human and hopped on down the road. 50 yards away the Easter Bunny stopped, turned around, waved and hopped on down the road another 50 yards, turned, waved, hopped another 50 yards and waved again!
The man was astonished. He said to the woman, "What in heaven's name is in your spray can? What was it that you sprayed on the Easter Bunny?"
The woman turned the can around so the man could read the label. It said "Hair spray. Restores life to dead hair. Adds permanent wave."
Submitted by Jerry Roseland:
You might be a redneck if… you hid Easter eggs under cow pies.
Submitted by Rob Hansen:
"Equal" is not always synonymous with "the same." Men and women are created equal. But, boys and girls are not born the same.
You dress your little girl in her Easter Sunday best, and she'll look just as pretty when you finally make it to church an hour later.
You dress a boy in his Easter Sunday best, and he'll somehow find every mud puddle from your home to the church, even if you're driving there.
Groaners…
Q: How do bunnies stay healthy?
A: Eggercise
Q: What do you call Easter when you are hopping around?
A: Hoppy Easter!
Q: Why did the Easter egg hide?
A: He was a little chicken!
Q: What do you call a bunny with a large brain?
A: An egghead.
Q: What do you call a bunny with a dictionary in his pants?
A: A smarty pants.
Q: What do you call ten rabbits marching backwards?
A: A receding hareline.
Q: How do you catch a unique bunny?
A: UNIQUE UP ON IT!
Q: What did the rabbit say to the carrot?
A: It's been nice gnawing at you.
Knock, knock...
Who's there?
"Ether"!
"Ether" who?
"Ether" Bunny!
Knock, knock!
Who's there?
Philip.
Philip who?
Philip my basket with candy!
Knock, knock!
Who's there?
Chuck.
Chuck who?
Chuck-olate bunny!
Knock, knock!
Who's there?
Hedda.
Hedda who?
Hedda marshmallow egg for you, but I ate it!
Q: Why did a fellow rabbit say that the Easter Bunny was self-centered?
A: Because he is eggocentric.
Q: Do you know how bunnies stay in shape?
A: Hareobics.
Q: What's the difference between a bunny and a lumberjack?
A: One chews and hops, the other hews and chops.
Q: Why did the magician have to cancel his show?
A: He'd just washed his hare and couldn't do a thing with it.
Q: What do you call rabbits that marched in a long sweltering Easter parade?
A: Hot, cross bunnies.
The Night Before Easter…
'Twas the night before Easter. All was calm and laid back.
Fred, the mouse in the kitchen, snarfed down a late snack.
The eggs were all dyed but still drippy and sticky...
To be honest, they looked just a little bit icky.
There were big jelly beans, chocolate bunnies and such,
And as Fred stuffed his face, he sighed, "This is too much!"
Phil and Rose were in bed watching late night TV,
While munching saltines with low-sodium Brie.
Then a sudden commotion rang out in the night.
It shook Phil and Rose, really gave them a fright.
Phil's hair stood on end, and his eyes bugged out big...
Rose whipped off the covers and knocked off her wig.
They lunged to the window, yanked open the blinds...
What they saw was amazing; it boggled their minds:
Across the night sky, with a noise like the dickens,
Soared a minivan drawn by eight overgrown chickens!
At the wheel sat a bunny -- cute, fuzzy and fat --
In designer blue jeans and a Panama hat.
Like a speeding space shuttle, those chickens they flew,
As the van driver called to each hen in his crew:
"Now, Ashley! Now, Sheila! Now, Kelsey and Bo!
On Bethany, Liza! On Daphne, on Flo!"
The van made its landing lickety-split ...
Nearly wiped out the shrubs and the barbecue pit!
Then up on the roof, much to Phil's consternation,
They squawked of egg prices and space navigation.
They made so much noise that Phil started to stammer,
"If you guys don't shut up, we'll get thrown in the slammer!"
Fuzzy hopped down the chimney, amidst all this racket,
And emerged from the fireplace, adjusting his jacket.
This bunny was chic, he had class, he had flair ..
Not your average bozo, not your typical hare.
His ears were enormous; his huge overbite
Was right under a nose like a pink neon light.
His manner was smooth, he was hip, he was cool;
This floppy-eared bunny was no fuzzy fool.
"While I'm here," he smiled, "Everybody relaxes ...
I'm not selling storm windows, won't audit your taxes.
I'm just here to bring you some fun and delight.
Eat, drink, and be merry! Let's party tonight!"
So they sipped diet soda and swapped silly jokes,
Those birds and their bunny just being plain folks.
Then flop-ears said, "Hey, friends, we've had quite a ball,
But my chickens and I are now due in St. Paul!"
He crossed both his eyes. Then he wiggled one ear,
And he yelled to his chicken team, "We're outta here!"
As the minivan rose in the 3 a.m. sky,
He called out, "Later, Phil! And to you, Rose, good-bye!"
As he sped out of sight, his two friends heard him say,
"Happy Easter to all! Have a beautiful day!"
What I Learned From The Easter Bunny…
All work and no play can make you a basket case.
Walk softly and carry a big carrot.
The best things in life are still sweet and gooey!
Everyone is entitled to a bad hare day.
Keep your paws off other people's jellybeans.
Everyone needs a friend who is all ears.
To show your true colors you have to come out of your shell.
There's no such thing as too much candy.
I hope you all enjoy the real meaning of Easter,
Al
"Easter says you can put truth in a grave, but it won't stay there." Clarence W
Good Tuesday Morning April 7 to all. The rain returned yesterday and is supposed to be with us for 4 days.
Regards
Skip
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Today in Naval History
April 7
1776
The Continental brig Lexington, commanded by John Barry, captures the British tender Edward near the Virginia Capes after a fierce fight that takes nearly an hour.
1944
USS Saufley (DD 465) sinks the Japanese submarine I 2, west-northwest of New Hanover, while USS Champlin (DD 601) is damaged after intentionally ramming German submarine U-856 380 miles off Nova Scotia, Canada. Champlin then teams with USS Huse (DE 145) to sink U-856.
1944
USS Gustafson (DE 182) sinks the German submarine U 857 off Cape Cod, Mass.
1945
Fast Carrier Task Force 58 aircraft attack the Japanese First Diversion Attack Force, sinking Japanese battleship Yamato and light cruiser Yahagi west-southwest of Kagoshima, Japan, as well as sinking four Japanese destroyers and damaging four others in the East China Sea.
1990
The Los Angeles-class fast attack submarine USS Albany (SSN 573) is commissioned at Naval Station Norfolk.
1979
USS Ohio (SSBN 726), the first Trident submarine, launches at Groton, Conn. She is commissioned into the Navy in November that same year. Following a conversion to a guided-missile submarine in 2006, she is now SSGN-726.
1993
The Avenger-class mine countermeasure ship USS Warrior (MCM 10) is commissioned. The ship is currently based in Sasebo, Japan.
2017
On the orders of President Trump, USS Ross (DDG 71) and USS Porter (DDG 78) launch Tomahawk missiles into Syria April 7, in retaliation for the regime of Bashar Assad using nerve agents to attack his own people.
Thanks to CHINFO
Executive Summary:
• Numerous outlets reported on Secretary Modly's apology to the crew and former CO of USS Theodore Roosevelt.
• Multiple outlets report that President Trump granted Governor Cuomo's request for USNS Comfort to accept COVID-19 patients ahead of an anticipated spike in infections in New York.
• Navy Times reports that the first crew member on USNS Comfort tested positive for COVID-19.
This Day in World History April 7
1199 English King Richard I is killed by an arrow at the Siege of the Castle of Chalus in France.
1789 The First U.S. Congress begins regular sessions at Federal Hall in New York City.
1814 Granted sovereignty in the island of Elba and a pension from the French government, Napoleon Bonaparte abdicates at Fontainebleau. He is allowed to keep the title of emperor.
1830 Joseph Smith and five others organize the Church of Latter-Day Saints in Seneca, New York.
1862 Confederate forces attack General Ulysses S. Grant at Shiloh, Tennessee.
1865 At the Battle of Sailer's Creek, a third of Lee's army is cut off by Union troops pursuing him to Appomattox.
1896 The Modern Olympics begin in Athens with eight nations participating.
1903 French Army Nationalists are revealed to have forged documents to guarantee a conviction for Alfred Dreyfus.
1909 Americans Robert Peary and Matthew Henson become the first men to reach the North Pole.
1917 The United States declares war on Germany and enters World War I on Allied side.
1924 Four planes leave Seattle on the first successful flight around the world.
1938 The United States recognizes Nazi Germany's conquest of Austria.
1941 German forces invade Greece and Yugoslavia.
1965 President Lyndon B. Johnson authorizes the use of ground troops in combat operations.
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Thanks to Barrel
from a FedEx Pilot
FedEx still operating close to peak internationally, but we've slowed severely domestically. Balances out financially, as we're still "above the line" (reference our last quarterly earnings statement). We've pulled 4 "semi-retired" FedEx MD-11s out of the desert and sent them to the Pacific (where I've been operating for the past 2 ½ months). Every run we're flying there (between Honolulu, Sydney, Guangzhou, Osaka, Narita, Singapore, Thailand, Hong Kong, etc…) are maxed out. No one else flying, so all that residual cargo is being directed our way. That being said, every route is nearly empty, and every airport is completely full of parked jets. A couple of examples:
Flew from Osaka to Beijing during 1 segment of a trip, and saw only 2 additional aircraft airborne the entire flight. During the time we fly that route (one of the busiest in the world), nearly 100+ additional aircraft are normally airborne. Silence on the radio, from the controllers, etc… most pacific airports have 1 controller that now covers regional approach, tower, and ground… ALL 3 of them. We landed in Beijing and were the only moving aircraft the entire time we taxied in, dropped our cargo, reloaded, and taxied out. Saw 2 other aircraft moving on the ground as we took off. But that was it. Literally 600+ aircraft parked in every square inch of concrete on that airport. Beijing (and most airports like it) are down to 1 runway, with all additional being used as parking lots for aircraft. Very eerie to see it like that.
Was lucky enough to have a United deadhead back from Osaka to SFO at the conclusion of one of my runs. Osaka is one of the busiest international "jump-off points" in Japan, and FedEx has a great facility there. From the time I made my way from the FedEx aircraft we landed there, checked in through one of the largest customs facilities I've ever seen (at Osaka International), took an inter-airport train to the international terminal, and finally made my way to the only 1 of 6 lounges open to await my flight's departure (United), I only saw 2 people in the entire airport terminal. TWO. That United flight was on a 787, and Polaris Business Class (which normally holds about 36 people) had 4 of us in it. The entire aircraft had about 40 people total… most were United employees (aircrew and attendants) repositioning back to the United States after their routes had been cancelled. This was United's last flight between Osaka and SFO for a long while (apparently), and there were many hugs and tears with United personnel, Japan airport folks they knew, etc… And the entire United ground crew lined up in a formation to solute the aircraft as we departed… reminded me of Navy cruises when we were launching aircraft to head back to the beach after 6+ months.
Global devastation and economic impacts are very apparent as one travels as much as we do internationally. This is going to take YEARS to recover, and return any semblance of "normalcy" (if that term is even relevant any longer) to many areas all over the globe. Incredible to see the lengths FedEx goes to, to keep us all healthy and protected through this mess. My hats off to our dispatchers, ground managers, and everyone on the team who's making it happen safely for us all… as regulations and customs requirements literally change day to day… flight by flight.
Best,
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Thanks to Al
Monday Morning Thoughts and Humor--Easter
Realizing that most or all of us will be home during this upcoming Holy Week, not all churches have the capability to broadcast services. Our church has been able to broadcast during the current "shelter in place" order. If you would like to worship with us via the internet, here are the links:
7:00PM April 9--Maundy Thursday Service: https://zoom.us/j/740588919
7:00PM April 10--Good Friday Tenebrae Service: https://zoom.us/j/661772864
10:00AM April 12--Easter Sunday Live Stream Service: https://youtu.be/JsjW1BPLVTk
Submitted by John Hudson:
A visiting pastor attended a men's breakfast in the middle of a rural farming area of the country. The group had asked an older farmer decked out in coveralls to say grace for the morning breakfast.
"Lord, I hate buttermilk", the farmer began.
The visiting pastor opened one eye to glance at the farmer and wonder where this was going.
The farmer loudly proclaimed, "Lord, I hate lard."
Now the pastor was growing concerned.
Without missing a beat, the farmer continued, "And Lord, you know I don't much care for raw white flour".
The pastor once again opened an eye to glance around the room and saw that he wasn't the only one to feel uncomfortable.
Then the farmer added, "But Lord, when you mix them all together and bake them, I do love warm fresh biscuits. So Lord, when things come up that we don't like, when life gets hard, when we don't understand what you're saying to us, help us to just relax and wait until you are done mixing. It will probably be even better than biscuits. Amen"
Within that silly prayer, there is great wisdom for all when it comes to complicated situations like we are experiencing in the world today.
Submitted by Al Anderson:
Jeremy was born with a twisted body and a slow mind. At the age of 12, he was still in second grade, seemingly unable to learn. His teacher, Doris Miller, often became exasperated with him. He would squirm in his seat, drool, and make grunting noises. At other times, he spoke clearly and distinctly, as if a spot of light had penetrated the darkness of his brain. Most of the time, however, Jeremy just irritated his teacher.
One day she called his parents and asked them to come in for a consultation. As the Forresters entered the empty classroom, Doris said to them, "Jeremy really belongs in a special school. It isn't fair to him to be with younger children who don't have learning problems. Why, there is a five year gap between his age and that of the other students."
Mrs. Forrester cried softly into a tissue, while her husband spoke. "Miss Miller," he said, "there is no school of that kind nearby. It would be a terrible shock for Jeremy if we had to take him out of this school. We know he really likes it here."
Doris sat for a long time after they had left, staring at the snow outside the window. Its coldness seemed to seep into her soul. She wanted to sympathize with the Forresters. After all, their only child had a terminal illness. But it wasn't fair to keep him in her class. She had 18 other youngsters to teach, and Jeremy was a distraction. Furthermore, he would never learn to read and write. Why waste any more time trying? As she pondered the situation, guilt washed over her. Here I am complaining when my problems are nothing compared to that poor family, she thought. "Lord, please help me to be more patient with Jeremy."
From that day on, she tried hard to ignore Jeremy's noises and his blank stares. Then one day, he limped to her desk, dragging his bad leg behind him. "I love you, Miss Miller," he exclaimed, loud enough for the whole class to hear. The other students snickered, and Doris' face turned red.
She stammered, "Wh-why that's very nice, Jeremy. N-now please take your seat."
Spring came, and the children talked excitedly about the coming of Easter. Doris told them the story of Jesus, and then to emphasize the idea of new life springing forth, she gave each of the children a large plastic egg. "Now," she said to them, "I want you to take this home and bring it back tomorrow with something inside that shows new life. Do you understand?"
"Yes, Miss Miller," the children responded enthusiastically, all except for Jeremy.
He listened intently; his eyes never left her face. He did not even make his usual noises. Had he understood what she had said about Jesus' death and resurrection? Did he understand the assignment? Perhaps she should call his parents and explain the project to them.
That evening, Doris' kitchen sink stopped up. She called the landlord and waited an hour for him to come by and unclog it. After that, she still had to shop for groceries, iron a blouse, and prepare a vocabulary test for the next day. She completely forgot about phoning Jeremy's parents.
The next morning, 19 children came to school, laughing and talking as they placed their eggs in the large wicker basket on Miss Miller's desk. After they completed their math lesson, it was time to open the eggs.
In the first egg, Doris found a flower. "Oh yes, a flower is certainly a sign of new life," she said. "When plants peek through the ground, we know that spring is here."
A small girl in the first row waved her arm. "That's my egg, Miss Miller," she called out.
The next egg contained a plastic butterfly, which looked very real. Doris held it up. "We all know that a caterpillar changes and grows into a beautiful butterfly. Yes, that's new life, too."
Little Judy smiled proudly and said, "Miss Miller, that one is mine."
Next, Doris found a rock with moss on it. She explained that moss, too, showed life.
Billy spoke up from the back of the classroom, "My daddy helped me," he beamed.
Then Doris opened the fourth egg. She gasped. The egg was empty. Surely it must be Jeremy's she thought, and of course, he did not understand her instructions. If only she had not forgotten to phone his parents. Because she did not want to embarrass him, she quietly set the egg aside and reached for another.
Suddenly, Jeremy spoke up. "Miss Miller, aren't you going to talk about my egg?"
Flustered, Doris replied, "But Jeremy, your egg is empty."
He looked into her eyes and said softly, "Yes, but Jesus' tomb was empty, too.'
Time stopped. When she could speak again, Doris asked him, "Do you know why the tomb was empty?"
"Oh, yes," Jeremy said, "Jesus was killed and put in there. Then His Father raised Him up."
The recess bell rang. While the children excitedly ran out to the school yard, Doris cried. The cold inside her melted completely away.
Three months later, Jeremy died. Those who paid their respects at the mortuary were surprised to see 19 eggs on top of his casket, all of them empty.
The making of these Easter cookies are a really great "hands-on" way of helping the children in your lives, to understand what Easter is all about. It is recommended that they be made Saturday night before Easter. You will need::
1c. whole pecans
1 tsp. vinegar
3 egg whites
A pinch of salt
1c. sugar
Zipper baggie
Wooden spoon
Tape
Bible
· Preheat oven to 300 (This is important--don't wait till you're half done with the recipe).
· Place pecans in zipper baggie and let children beat them with the wooden spoon to break into small pieces. Explain that after Jesus was arrested, He was beaten by the Roman soldiers. Read John 19:1-3.
· Let each child smell the vinegar. Put 1 tsp. vinegar into mixing bowl. Explain that when Jesus was thirsty on the cross, he was given vinegar to drink. Read John 19:28-30.
· Add egg whites to vinegar. Eggs represent life. Explain that Jesus gave His life to give us life. Read John 10:10-11.
· Sprinkle a little salt into each child's hand. Let them taste it and brush the rest into the bowl. Explain that this represents the salty tears shed by Jesus' followers, and the bitterness of our own sin. Read Luke 23:27.
· So far, the ingredients are not very appetizing. Add 1c. sugar. Explain that the sweetest part of the story is that Jesus died because He loves us. He wants us to know and belong to Him. Read Ps. 34:8 and John 3:16.
· Beat with a mixer on high speed for 12 to 15 minutes until stiff peaks are formed. Explain that the color white represents the purity in God's eyes of those whose sins have been cleansed by Jesus. Read Isa. 1:18 and John 3:1-3.
· Fold in broken nuts Drop by teaspoons onto wax paper covered cookie sheet. Explain that each mound represents the rocky tomb where Jesus' body was laid. Read Matt. 27:57-60.
· Put the cookie sheet in the oven, close the door and turn the oven off. Give each child a piece of tape and seal the oven door. Explain that Jesus' tomb was sealed. Read Matt. 27:65-66.
· GO TO BED! Explain that they may feel sad to leave the cookies in the oven overnight. Jesus' followers were in despair when the tomb was sealed. Read John 16:20 and 22.
· On Easter morning, open the oven and give everyone a cookie. Notice the cracked surface and take a bite. The cookies are hollow!
· On the first Easter, Jesus' followers were amazed to find the tomb open and empty. Read Matt. 28:1-9
And now for some humor…
Still haven't decided where to go for Easter…the living room or the bedroom.
Top Reasons to Celebrate Easter Sunday:
You absolutely loved the movie, "The Ten Commandments".
You look really, really good in yellow.
It's a good time to check out your neighborhood church and not be noticed.
You have this bunny suit you love to wear, but are too insecure to wear it without a reason.
Even though you don't know what it is, you really like the sound of hearing the "Passion story."
You figured since Jesus went to all THAT trouble to make it to the first Easter, you'd give it a shot.
As a Christian you celebrate the resurrection every other day, why not Easter too?
Yesterday, Palm Sunday, because of a sore throat, five-year-old Johnny stayed home from church with a sitter. When the family returned home, they were carrying several palm fronds. Johnny asked them what they were for.
"People held them over Jesus' head as he walked by," his father told him.
"Wouldn't you know it," Johnny fumed, "the one Sunday I don't go and he shows up."
Submitted by Alan Krause Jr.:
It was that time, during the Sunday morning service, for the children's sermon. All the children were invited to come forward.
One little girl was wearing a particularly pretty dress and, as she sat down, the pastor leaned over and said, "That is a very pretty dress. Is it your Easter Dress?"
The little girl replied, directly into the pastor's clip-on microphone, "Yes, and my Mom says it's a 'bitch' to iron."
A friend was in front of me coming out of church one day, and the preacher was standing at the door as he always is to shake hands. He grabbed my friend by the hand and pulled him aside.
Pastor said, "You need to join the Army of the Lord!"
My friend said, "I'm already in the Army of the Lord, Pastor."
Pastor questioned, "How come I don't see you except at Christmas and Easter?"
He whispered back, "I'm in the secret service."
One Easter Sunday morning as the minister was preaching the children's sermon; he reached into his bag of props and pulled out an egg. He pointed at the egg and asked the children, "What's in here?"
"I know" a little boy exclaimed..."Pantyhose!"
Submitted by Adela Pizano:
A man was blissfully driving along the highway, when he saw the Easter Bunny hopping across the middle of the road. He swerved to avoid hitting the bunny, but unfortunately the rabbit jumped in front of his car and was hit. The basket of eggs went flying all over the place.
The driver, being a sensitive man as well as an animal lover, pulled over to the side of the road, and got out to see what had become of the bunny carrying the basket. Much to his dismay, the colorful bunny was dead. The driver felt guilty and began to cry.
A woman driving down the same highway saw the man crying on the side of the road and pulled over. She stepped out of her car and asked the man what was wrong. "I feel terrible," he explained, "I accidentally hit the Easter Bunny and killed it. There may not be an Easter because of me. What should I do?"
The woman told the man not to worry. She knew exactly what to do. She went to her car trunk, and pulled out a spray can. She walked over to the limp, dead bunny, and sprayed the entire contents of the can onto the furry animal.
Miraculously the Easter Bunny came back to life, jumped up, picked up the spilled eggs and candy, waved its paw at the two human and hopped on down the road. 50 yards away the Easter Bunny stopped, turned around, waved and hopped on down the road another 50 yards, turned, waved, hopped another 50 yards and waved again!
The man was astonished. He said to the woman, "What in heaven's name is in your spray can? What was it that you sprayed on the Easter Bunny?"
The woman turned the can around so the man could read the label. It said "Hair spray. Restores life to dead hair. Adds permanent wave."
Submitted by Jerry Roseland:
You might be a redneck if… you hid Easter eggs under cow pies.
Submitted by Rob Hansen:
"Equal" is not always synonymous with "the same." Men and women are created equal. But, boys and girls are not born the same.
You dress your little girl in her Easter Sunday best, and she'll look just as pretty when you finally make it to church an hour later.
You dress a boy in his Easter Sunday best, and he'll somehow find every mud puddle from your home to the church, even if you're driving there.
Groaners…
Q: How do bunnies stay healthy?
A: Eggercise
Q: What do you call Easter when you are hopping around?
A: Hoppy Easter!
Q: Why did the Easter egg hide?
A: He was a little chicken!
Q: What do you call a bunny with a large brain?
A: An egghead.
Q: What do you call a bunny with a dictionary in his pants?
A: A smarty pants.
Q: What do you call ten rabbits marching backwards?
A: A receding hareline.
Q: How do you catch a unique bunny?
A: UNIQUE UP ON IT!
Q: What did the rabbit say to the carrot?
A: It's been nice gnawing at you.
Knock, knock...
Who's there?
"Ether"!
"Ether" who?
"Ether" Bunny!
Knock, knock!
Who's there?
Philip.
Philip who?
Philip my basket with candy!
Knock, knock!
Who's there?
Chuck.
Chuck who?
Chuck-olate bunny!
Knock, knock!
Who's there?
Hedda.
Hedda who?
Hedda marshmallow egg for you, but I ate it!
Q: Why did a fellow rabbit say that the Easter Bunny was self-centered?
A: Because he is eggocentric.
Q: Do you know how bunnies stay in shape?
A: Hareobics.
Q: What's the difference between a bunny and a lumberjack?
A: One chews and hops, the other hews and chops.
Q: Why did the magician have to cancel his show?
A: He'd just washed his hare and couldn't do a thing with it.
Q: What do you call rabbits that marched in a long sweltering Easter parade?
A: Hot, cross bunnies.
The Night Before Easter…
'Twas the night before Easter. All was calm and laid back.
Fred, the mouse in the kitchen, snarfed down a late snack.
The eggs were all dyed but still drippy and sticky...
To be honest, they looked just a little bit icky.
There were big jelly beans, chocolate bunnies and such,
And as Fred stuffed his face, he sighed, "This is too much!"
Phil and Rose were in bed watching late night TV,
While munching saltines with low-sodium Brie.
Then a sudden commotion rang out in the night.
It shook Phil and Rose, really gave them a fright.
Phil's hair stood on end, and his eyes bugged out big...
Rose whipped off the covers and knocked off her wig.
They lunged to the window, yanked open the blinds...
What they saw was amazing; it boggled their minds:
Across the night sky, with a noise like the dickens,
Soared a minivan drawn by eight overgrown chickens!
At the wheel sat a bunny -- cute, fuzzy and fat --
In designer blue jeans and a Panama hat.
Like a speeding space shuttle, those chickens they flew,
As the van driver called to each hen in his crew:
"Now, Ashley! Now, Sheila! Now, Kelsey and Bo!
On Bethany, Liza! On Daphne, on Flo!"
The van made its landing lickety-split ...
Nearly wiped out the shrubs and the barbecue pit!
Then up on the roof, much to Phil's consternation,
They squawked of egg prices and space navigation.
They made so much noise that Phil started to stammer,
"If you guys don't shut up, we'll get thrown in the slammer!"
Fuzzy hopped down the chimney, amidst all this racket,
And emerged from the fireplace, adjusting his jacket.
This bunny was chic, he had class, he had flair ..
Not your average bozo, not your typical hare.
His ears were enormous; his huge overbite
Was right under a nose like a pink neon light.
His manner was smooth, he was hip, he was cool;
This floppy-eared bunny was no fuzzy fool.
"While I'm here," he smiled, "Everybody relaxes ...
I'm not selling storm windows, won't audit your taxes.
I'm just here to bring you some fun and delight.
Eat, drink, and be merry! Let's party tonight!"
So they sipped diet soda and swapped silly jokes,
Those birds and their bunny just being plain folks.
Then flop-ears said, "Hey, friends, we've had quite a ball,
But my chickens and I are now due in St. Paul!"
He crossed both his eyes. Then he wiggled one ear,
And he yelled to his chicken team, "We're outta here!"
As the minivan rose in the 3 a.m. sky,
He called out, "Later, Phil! And to you, Rose, good-bye!"
As he sped out of sight, his two friends heard him say,
"Happy Easter to all! Have a beautiful day!"
What I Learned From The Easter Bunny…
All work and no play can make you a basket case.
Walk softly and carry a big carrot.
The best things in life are still sweet and gooey!
Everyone is entitled to a bad hare day.
Keep your paws off other people's jellybeans.
Everyone needs a friend who is all ears.
To show your true colors you have to come out of your shell.
There's no such thing as too much candy.
I hope you all enjoy the real meaning of Easter,
Al
"Easter says you can put truth in a grave, but it won't stay there." Clarence W
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